Remember when you used to jump rope and the pesky rope kept getting in the way? Well now there is a new invention for those too clumsy to jump rope. A ropeless jump rope! Or...handles! Thank god! Now I actually can jump up and down and all I need to do is buy these handles?!! Yay! I can't wait to get mine so I can jump in celebration of the handles!

Some people are angry about the Da Vinci Code saying that its 'anti-Jesus', 'anti-Catholic' and 'anti-albino'. The most offensive thing about that movie is how bad it is. Does anyone remember a Chevy Chase/ Goldie Hawn movie called Foul Play? It too had to do with albinos and the Catholic Church, but was actually better... cause it was appropriately a comedy. Was this what Dan Brown was watching when he started to write this thing? The Da Vinci Code was funny, but I don't think it was meant to be. An example is the scene with the albino whipping himself with that dramatic music in the background. Maybe it was the music, maybe it was the guy's fake eyes and bleached hair but all together it just seemed a little forced and a little silly- like when directors put dwarves in dream sequences. I just kept thinking of Living in Oblivion. One good thing about the movie was the historical theories about Jesus' life, those were pretty interesting. Though I saw that in a movie before called the Last Temptation of Christ which was really good because Jesus was played by Willem Dafoe and had this great New York accent. But back to Da Vinci, Tom Hanks seemed to phone this one in, not that I blame him. He probably knew it wasn't going to be that good. I'm guessing next he'll be doing a sequel to Turner and Hooch. Audry Tautou was pretty good, being the first movie I've seen her in speaking English- not quite Amelie but she was okay. And one more thing about Da Vinci that made it suck- it was 2 1/2 hours long! I'd give it 1 1/2 out of 5 butters, it earned those mostly because of Audry Tautou, Jean Reno and the thought of Jesus having a wife and babies is kind of sweet.

Want to see a real head scratcher?

Insurers Saw Record Gains in Year of Catastrophic Loss

For a while I was actually concerned that some of the insurance companies may have to file for bankruptcy after so many properties were devastated by Katrina. Well, big surprise; they not only were able to make it through the year but they were actually able to continue making profits or better yet, record gains. 'How?' you may ask: Well, by insuring themselves of course. So the reasons you may be paying such a high premium on your insurance is because you're not only paying for your insurance but you also paying for their insurance. Can't we just go straight to their insurer and skip the expensive middle guy?

So about that BBC wrong "Guy" interview- apparently they got it wrong again, he was not a cab driver. He was in the BBC waiting room waiting to be interviewed for a job as a “Data Support Cleanser”. His name is Guy Goma so when the producer came into the wrong Waiting Room and called for "Guy" he stood up to be interviewed...for a job. Here's a BBC interview with him and the real Guy Kewney. And here is the original interview. So funny.
Update: It looks like the BBC has forced youtube.com to take down the video of the interview with both "Guys". Oh well, it was fun while it lasted.

Oh goodie, a new debate with the weazel and the nutjob.

Here is a very funny story I heard on the Rachel Maddow Show earlier today. To summarize, a BBC 24 hour channel was about to do an interview with a technology expert about the Apple / Beatles lawsuit when they mistakenly pulled in his cab driver and started interviewing him instead. Its funny cause the cabbie totally plays it off like he knows what he's talking about. Make sure you watch the video, the look on the cab drivers face when he realizes that he's being interviewed is priceless.

Holy Moly!!! 29% approval! 71% disapproval! Those are like Nixon numbers.

The government knows who you call. They know who calls you. They get records from your phone company. They got records on everybody!
Paper Reports NSA Collecting Phone Records
And who knows why, its not like they have enough people to go through every American's phone records. Maybe its just a dumb power trip. Can you imagine the eyes that must have been rolling when that order was given?
-'Get records on every single phone call made in the country!'
-'Uh... yeah.'
These guys are brilliant.

Rupert Murdoch Loves Hillary Clinton
Ewe.

U.S. Newborn Survival Rate Ranks Low

Sad. Now the hypocrisy of it all is that many republicans who are "prolife", would also oppose a national healthcare system, the most important move the US can make to help save babies' lives. Although admittedly, I do know a couple of republicans who've changed their minds on Universal Healthcare. I think when a working, middle, income person can't afford healthcare, there is definitely a problem with the system. Hopefully the country will start electing people who will actually do something to help the people instead of creating more problems. Hillary Clinton was ridiculed when she brought up the idea of Universal Healthcare when she was first lady and sadly hasn't brought it up again since and probably won't if she runs for president in 2008.

Update: Oh God- the republicans are doing something. They're having a "health week". Here's what that nonsense is about.

There's this mayoral election coming up for New Orleans. Mitch Landrieu or Ray Nagin. The weasel or the cuckoo. I liked Nagin for a while until he started being all crazy with his chocolate city and gambling zones. What a nutcase. And Landrieu has a lot of political connections to get things done but seems so arrogant and well, weasely. I don't know of course, he could be the kindest and best intentioned politician in the whole world, but I doubt it. It seems his whole family was raised to be politicians. They breed them. Mary Landrieu has shown herself to be a weasel with voting for the bankruptcy bill among other things, and I suspect he's probably pretty similar. At this point, I don't even care who wins.

Here's one of today's headlines. Its never the same when you click the link to it. That is here. What is that? Jerks. Anyway, the story is about another guy with the cajones to speak up against the administration. This time Rummy is in the crosshairs. Here's the video and boy does he get squirmy! Thing is, CNN uses the word "heckled" in the headlines. Like this guy is mindlessly shouting obscenities and being rude- so not the case. The guy is Ray McGovern, a former CIA analyst who asked questions no CNN reporter ever asked Rumsy. To use that word to describe him obliterates any idea of CNN being liberally biased. If you check out who pays CNN you may understand why.

Stephen Colbert has serious cajones!
Go thank the man for nailing them.